Monday, March 29, 2010

San Francisco or Paris?

Today after a doctor appointment in San Francisco, I ducked out of the rain into a cute little french bakery on Union Street.  It was the lunch rush and things were bustling.  I ordered a latte and a crossiant heading over to the far wall to wait with other patrons.
It was a darling little cafe filled with new moms with babies nestled close, businessmen and women lunching, young people texting.  I don't even know the name of the place.  I stood there and waited and waited and waited.  Pretty soon I was fuming.  There was one woman making the coffee drinks and she stepped away to handle a problem with a seated guest.  The place was steamy with bakery smells and the rain outside.  I was considering calling the manager.
Suddenly it occurred to me - if this was Paris I would be loving it!  The people and barrista would seem so charming.  Oh, the French, so quaint and unpretentious.  I remember being in Paris last May and the heigth of the trip was when a french waiter ignored us, looking down at us with distain when we tried to order!  I laughed out loud with the memory.  Deep breath....
The line began to move.  My name was called.  It's good to be alive this spring day in San Francisco.
(I've added a picture of my Dearly Beloved and I in a Paris Cafe last May - 'Je T'aime)

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Twelve hundred miles of Spring

Spring came roaring in this year, somehow I just missed the arrival. Suddenly the world is green! It seems like only last week it was hailing and cold.

My Dearly Beloved and I traveled twelve hundred miles round trip to visit our our sons. First up to Humboldt County. Through cities, through vineyards and then the huge swaths of Redwoods. Everything was alive and green. All the coastal hills that will turn golden in a few months were like velvet. After Eureka we traveled north along the breathtaking coast of northern California and Southern Oregon.

The Oregon coast is always wild and untamed. This trip we stayed in Yachats, OR. It was a still and warm day, a miracle in itself. Offshore there were whales spouting on their journey south and it could not have been more beautiful. We collected agates and driftwood from the beaches. Then headed inland to Eugene and had a lovely visit with our UO student. We had a great time doing what he likes best, eating out. We took a walk along the river and enjoyed the weather.

My favorite part was our hike to the top of Spencer Butte. It was a warm clear day with a 360 degree view of Eugene and beyond. While we were sitting at the top I was reminded of the song 'Landslide'. My favorite version is by the Dixie Chicks.
Three years ago I was sitting in the University of Oregon Basketball Gym at the Parent Orientation session. There was music playing and the Landslide song came on. I burst into tears, it expressed so much of what I was going through.

"Well, I've been afraid of changin'
'Cause I built my life around you
But time makes you older, Children get older
I'm getting older too"

The whole song was so true.
Up on Spencer Butte, that song rang in my ears, again, every verse so true. But this time I wasn't crying. There was joy and fresh air and the ones I love with me. We've come a long way....

"Oh, mirror in the sky
What is love?
Can the child within my heart rise above
Can I sail through the changing ocean tides"
Can I handle the seasons of my life"

Well maybe..

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Let it all spill out...

Starting a blog was only the beginning. Now I actually have to post. This is sometimes difficult because I tend to hold my emotions and thoughts inside. Although this may seem obvious, it wasn't something I considered when beginning.

I recently took a communication course through Landmark Education. There have been many miracles from those weekends and am working hard to speak the truth in my life.
I discovered I am not a stand for myself and my artistic expression. Getting me in to my studio is the very last thing on the lists that I make. When they said I could have anything I wanted for myself and my life I didn't realise it would take the whole me to come out of hiding and holding back from others. It is no mystery why I'm struggling with making art.

Having Anything I want for my life is something I'm not familiar with. I would say Anything for my children, Anything for my husband, Anything for my friends, but Anything for me is something that until I took that seminar was just not possible. Now I see I too can have Anything I want for my life. It's me that needs to show up!

The possibility I am creating for my life and my future is fearless honesty in communication and full self expression.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

A Treasure from the Fair

Last weekend my Sister came for a visit. We had an amazing time as sisters often do. We ate, laughed, talked, shopped and did I mention eating?

We saw the play Wicked. Delightful, charming, I'm still humming the song Defying Gravity! Walked The Royal Pug, watched the Academy Awards and made vanilla cupcakes with the Magnolia Bakery recipe.

Best of all was our trip to The Alameda Point Antique and Collectible Fair. Wow, what a place! So many vendors, so many buyers, so much stuff for sale. This was my first time and it lived up to it's reputation. My sis bought some cute cat miniatures, rabbit candle sticks and some 1950's drinking glasses with gold pears on the outside. The vendors really knew their jewelry and prices. I picked up some lace, baby shoes and a french language book to collage with.

I have been hunting for a mannequin to display my jewelry on for some time. They've all been too shabby or the frame is distracting or way too much money. As we were leaving I spotted a wonderful vendor from the Tattered House in Roseville. The booth was decorated with all kinds of yummy things. I think the owner's name is Sandy and she had the dress form of my dreams! I looked it over and quickly asked her "Is she for sale"? YES! and I paid her on the spot so no one could come between me and my prize. Before I could leave the booth Sandy shared some of the most delicious coffee cake I have ever tasted. All that made for a very successful trip to the Fair! Check out my lovely new prize.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

What's my word?

A few weeks ago I was looking through some old Artful Blogging publications and reading about choosing a word to frame my year. This isn't a new idea and it is already March, but I have been wanting to Blog about my word for 2010 for a few weeks.

The word I chose was Rebirth.

2010 was going to be MY year. A new blog, new jewelry and projects, health, the whole world opening up. Then I got stopped. My journal wasn't going so well, my camera broke, I had difficulty with editing my posts. I'm spending a lot of time working in my husband's studio, sorting out the last few lost years and then my Lyme Disease doctor broke the news that my infection had gotten worse. My Rebirth got stopped.

I let the past 2 weeks take over and have a say in who I am.
But then I got to thinking, birth is not easy. It is a hard process. I remember what real birth was like. It takes stamina, courage and a leap of faith that life will turn out. Rebirth is that process, too.
This is not going to be easy, but I can do this. I can recapture my creative process, find my voice and live into this year - today and everyday I am choosing Rebirth.